Little Kurama and Wild E Hiei, A Different Story
by Ale-Bloody-Roses
Summary: A hiei x kurama fan fic, Written as a weird gay lover's game that ends up being like the Roadrunner cartoons! Better than it sounds, Read and Review!!!


Wild. E. Hiei and Little Kurama  
  
A Yuu Yuu Hakusho Story...  
  
No Shit Sherlock..  
  
Lived long ago in a...oh wait yeah the story! Gomen! P.s. Yes this has sort of gay themes, I'm a fan of Hiei or Kurama with  
me and not both of them together really. But review, hate me love me...Roses are nice though ^_~  
  
P.s.s I don't own them...WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I know so many fun things I could do with Hiei  
and Kurama if they were mine...*grin*  
  
Hiei: baka ningen. *threatens the authoress with his katana* get on with the damn story!  
  
Yes sir! er demon sir...sexy demon sir!  
  
Hiei: hn.  
  
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Narrator: In Kurama's nice two story apartment there was always plenty of sweet snow. This was one of the reasons that Hiei  
lived there that and that he actually enjoyed spending time with the kitsune that had gorgeous jungle green eyes. Also a   
beautiful mane of equally beautiful blood red hair. He wanted that sexy fox. Wanted him very much. Being a fire demon that  
hadn't done it in a few centuries he really wanted some hto foxy Kurama action! Kurama felt the same but liked to play with  
the little koorime's mind. So they haven't done it yet, but Hiei wanted to change that and quickly.  
  
(Open to Kurama's lovely apartment furnished in a soft colored scheme and there are many plant window boxes and potted flowers  
around the apartment. Tastefully of course. Hey this is Kurama we're talking about! Show Hiei sitting at the kitchen table  
watching Kurama prepare dinner.)  
  
Kurama: Hiei one day I'm not going to let you be lazy anymore and help me with making all this food. I'm not your maid...  
  
Hiei: *starts thinking of Kurama in a little maid's outfit* Hn.  
  
Kurama: Little fire demon why do you always say that?  
  
Hiei: *snaps out of daydream and glares at Kurama* Stupid fox, I'm not little!  
  
Kurama: Oh? Then what would you call it then?  
  
Hiei: You being a abnormally tall baka kitsune.  
  
Kurama: Hmm...*he turns around so his back is facing Hiei and a little smile plays on his lips* Oh I forgot to get the  
ketchup from the fridge, silly me with it being all the way in the back no wonder...*he walks forward to the fridge and bends  
down to look for the ketchup.*  
  
Hiei: *stares and his eye twitches a little as he watches Kurama's butt sway back and forth a little while he's looking  
through the fridge* Hn?  
  
Narrator: We all know what's going through Hiei's mind! No? What are you stupid? Oops...sorry...can't raise my voice or   
they'll hear me from my hiding place in the hallway closet. I have cameras all over this place and I'm not missing a thing!  
I mean *whispers* i'm not missing a thing...Hiei is really feeling the urge to capture Kurama and drag him into the bedroom.  
He knew that Kurama was toying with him and he decided to plan a way so that he can end the fox's games once and for all.  
  
Hiei: How long does it take for someone to find ketchup? Idiot. 8he smirked as he slinked away from the table and to his  
room upstairs*  
  
Kurama: Found it! *pulls out the ketchup cheerfully and turns around* Hiei? Hiei...Oh...he must of not been interested in the  
view...*Kurama looks a little sad and starts cooking again*  
  
Narrator: Ah if Kurama only knew! Well if he did we wouldn't have any fun now would we? We now join Hiei in his room upstairs  
he seems quite busy...NO! Not that way! busy as in productive busy not bus-ay! Sheesh.  
  
Hiei: Hmm...*looks over a blueprint* now if i can get Kurama to point B and then me to point C and release the rabid dog...  
now wait that would kill him...I want to fuck him not kill him...Musn't mix those two up.  
  
Narrator: O_O tough love just got crazy.  
  
Hiei: I know! That damn baby rose plant he fawns over so much! I'll use it as bait and then use my Acme rope hanging trap  
to get him! *sneers* that kitsune is gonna be sacked tonight..  
  
Narrator: What have I told them about all those puns?? If they didn't know about me spying on them right now I would blast   
them every time they used those terrible puns...hey even you don't know who I am huh? Well I'm...OH! Look what's happening now!  
  
Hiei: *sneaks into the living room and with his quick speed grabbed Kurama's prized baby rose plant and ran to where he set  
up the rope trap* Now by leaving this in the middle of the circle of rope when kurama goes to get his roses back the rope will   
snare him and having hanging upside down! Good thing I'm using quality brand Acme for the rope! *sets up the trap and goes to  
a corner of the room* KURAMA! Your flowers are possessed and moved to a different place! I'll have to slice them down to nothing  
just in case it is possessed! *pulls out his katana*  
  
Kurama: MY ROSES??? My babies! *runs into the room and spots the roses * How did you little things get here? come to daddy   
waddy my little schnookums!*picks the roses up and walks out of the room*  
  
Hiei: What??? My plan was fool proof! So simple even Kuwabara could of done it! you just walk into the circle like this and  
*rope trap is sprung and it leaves Hiei dangling upside down from the ceiling by his feet* fuck...  
  
Kurama: *walks back in* Hiei you haven't seen a leaf around here have you? one of the roses lost a lea---*stares up the  
fire demon glaring down* Hiei! How did you get up there?   
  
Hiei: You mine.  
  
Kurama: *blushed* What?  
  
Hiei: *cuts himself down and he starts to chase after Kurama* YOUR MINE!  
  
Kurama: You have to catch me first! meep meep! *zooms around the apartment*  
  
Hiei: I can't let him wear himself out so fast i got to...I know! *lightbulb appears over his head* hn. screw it. *runs after kurama*  
  
Narrator: Now why does all this seem familier somehow? something chasing after something the 2nd something always geting away  
and the first getting caught by his own trap. and ACME?!?!?!?! MEEP MEEP? It's a Roadrunnr cartoon! You've got to be kidding  
me.  
  
(Hiei and Kurama still chasing each other around and around neither of the fast speeds we're letting them gain or get away from each other.  
Then Boton flew in on her oar and put a time freeze spell on the two potential lovebirds)  
  
Boton: *scribbles down two signs and holds the first one up under Hiei* Hiei is a Coyoteus Koorimus Wanta Fuckius Kitstunomious, hee hee hee  
*holds up the second under Kurama* Kurama is a Playniforous Teasy flaming demons foxy boy. I should think a   
relationship could start between me and kurama, don't you Yuuske?  
  
(Time freeze ends Hiei and Kurama look at their signs and slowly start running really fast again)  
  
Narrotor: Damn it! Boton's going to blow my cover!  
  
Boton: I will not blow anyone's anything!  
  
Hiei and Kurama: *stop and stare at boton* What are you doing here?   
  
Hiei: I wouldn't ask you for a blow in a million years baka ferry girl.  
  
Boton: And I would never blow you for all of eternity you bad tempered shrimp!  
  
Hiei: Hn.  
  
Kurama: and do you mean by my sign foxy boy Boton? *winks at boton and gives her a rose*  
  
Boton: THANK YOU! *flies away on her oar giggling*  
  
Yusuke: they haven't figured it out that i'm narrating, they can't even hear the narrating! yes!  
  
Hiei: Kurama come here I think I got a mean paper cut from Boton's sign.  
  
Kurama: awe...*kisses the paper cut finger and then starts to suck it* all better?  
  
Hiei: *eyes are wide open and he takes his sign an knocks kurama unconcious with it* MINE! MINE!!!!  
  
Narrator: So now we're seeing Hiei drag Kurama up to his room and...TIEING HIM DOWN TO THE BED?? whoa...I don't think  
Lil' Beeper, er, Kurama can get out of this one! oh! Kurama's coming to....  
  
Hiei: *kisses Kurama and growls into his ear* Mine.  
  
Kurama: *passionatly kisses Hiei* mmm...and your mine little fire demon....   
  
Yusuke: AHHHHHHH AHHHHHHH AHHHHHHH...ah.....AHCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! shit.  
  
Kurama: Yusuke?  
  
Yusuke: *walks out of the closet and laughs nervously* hi guys! having fun?  
  
Hiei: If you leave now we will.  
  
Yusuke: C'mon Ale our authoress wanted to see you guys do it!  
  
Kurama: Are you sure it wasn't just you?  
  
Hiei: *pulls out his katana* leave now or the world will have one less baka ningen.  
  
Yusuke: sheesh. Bye! *runs off*  
  
Kurama: oh Hiei....  
  
Hiei: Hn?  
  
Kurama: Are you going to help me take these bondages off?  
  
Hiei: *evil smirk* Why baka fox why should I help you out of them?  
  
Narrator: *from a garbage can outside* And the coyote and the roadrunner....wait...Kurama and Hiei live happily ever   
after! listen to all that moning and screams of passion! They doing the shag nastay!  
  
Authorness: And so yusuke stopped being a peeping tom and went home. And Hiei and Kurama had sex and made out and continued  
doing this for many many many years to come. And they beat yusuke countless times in all those times from him trying to  
make it a 3 some.  
  
The END!  
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Please read and review! I'm rating it R just in case...! And read my other story which is a radio talk show, it's really funny.  
Next time I won't write a humore flic but a scary one....dun dun dun.  
-peace love and mushrooms-  
Ale 


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